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what santosha means to me 

2/7/2014

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I've been thinking a lot about santosha lately.  santosha is the yogic practice of contentment.


in a world of hustle and bustle, a place where people are perpetually on the search for the next best thing, is the practice of santosha even reachable anymore?  


i've been considering this on my mat recently.  when i was dealing with hardcore anxiety, i always had those thoughts... when i become less anxious i'll be happy.  if i didn't have so much pressure i would be less stressed.  if i could just reach this one work milestone or buy that one new thing i'll be completely satisfied. i found little solice in the present and was always focused on the future. 


that search for satisfaction and happiness was neverending because once i got what i thought i needed, i was already on the lookout for the next best thing, or worse, i still found myself riddled with anxiety.  


i started thinking about how my practice of santosha was shaken last year. i noticed that i had been falling into that same mindset i had when i was dealing with anxiety - if this than that.  if i just get past this one horrible thing, everything will be better. if i can make it through this tough time, things will ease up.  i came into 2014 with positive energy and was determined to make it a terrific year and truly release the resentments, mistakes and frustrations from the previous year. 


than something happened.  one little piece of my "perfect" puzzle wriggled out of place.  nothing catastrophic, but enough to make me take notice.  and i was ok with it.  i meditated.  i focused on breathing.  i let it go and was content with this little hiccup.  if this bump in the road happened last year, i think i would've exploded.  so what changed?  


it was then that i realized my mindset had changed.  i created the focus on positivity, growth and persistence for 2014 and everything that happened this year was going to happen for me rather than to me.  and i viewed this situation from that perspective.  i was content with it.  i was ok and i trusted the process.  the storms bring the sunshine. uphill climbs lead to high peaks. and i realized i had found my practice of santosha again! 


santosha is being ok with what happens.  it's being grounded amidst chaos. it's going with the flow.  it's being happy with the present moment. and for me, its trusting the process.  


everyone practices this differently.  some people focus on finding the joy in everything, others work through their feelings of dissatisfaction. i work on trusting the process and accepting the journey.  


and that's some serious gratitude ;)


sat nam!


xo, b 

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present moment musings

1/4/2014

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A little weekend inspiration

Sat nam

xo, b

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Ego VS Love 

9/10/2013

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My classes this week have been themed around love.  I was inspired to create a flow that focuses on our heart chakra after a beautiful conversation I had with someone this weekend.  

We were chatting about anxiety and fear and how they play such a huge role in how people live their lives.  I spent a big part of my life living with a fear-based, or EGO driven, mindset.  We've all been there.  Small battles with the Ego are a daily occurance for most of us. When we flow on our mats and get jealous of someone that falls into splits without breaking a sweat or when fear strikes hold at the thought of going into an arm balance and falling  or even when you judge a co-worker for going after a promotion that you were scared to go after for fear of failing...that's our Ego.  And that tricky little sucker likes to pop up and control us as much as it can.

During our conversation, I shared my thoughts on the Ego and how I work to combat it when it rears its gnarly little head.  At first glance, it might seem that to beat out this Ego, we should shift into the opposite mindset. And that's right!  But... the opposite mindset isn't what we first think of.  If the Ego causes fear-based living, then the opposite would seem like safety, but it's actually not.  Tricky Ego! When we buy into the illusion that the Ego creates (i'm not good enough. I can't do that. I'm dumb.  I'm not worthy of love.) we create a feeling of safety for ourselves.  Giving into that fear based mindset makes us feel like we are avoiding scary things.  We get fooled into thinking that this fear is serving a purpose.  And therefore, we feed into it even more.  We perpetuate the Ego loop- fear, avoidance, safety.  But when we move into the opposite mindset, we shine a light on that Ego and bust through it.  This opposite mindset is >LOVE<  

When we live from a place of Love, the Ego looses its grip on us.  We have faith, trust, acceptance and security.  And we don't have to do anything to get it.  We just vibrate with that energy.  We begin to see challenges as learning opportunities, fear dissolves with our faith and our journey is supported by our trust that we'll reach our destination.  

I had to move into that Loving space to stop hating my anxiety.  My Ego justified my anxious feelings and I felt comfortable keeping them around.  At the peak of my anxiety I hit rock bottom and had a choice.  Keep living in fear or shift to love.  I think you can guess which one I chose ;) 

Find time today to open your heart and radiate love.  

And be mindful of when the Ego tries to steer your course.  Stay commited to that loving mindset and set the intention for an attitude of gratitude!

Sat Nam xo
b
 



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A shift in perception

6/12/2013

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Everything that happens in our lives is neutral until we give it a meaning.  We have the power through our thoughts and interpretations to create challenges or blessings.  We can create our world through how we CHOOSE to see it. 

Be miracle-minded. 

xo, b
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How to Handle a Panic Attack...Yoga Style!

5/10/2013

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Panic attacks suck.  That's the only way I can describe them.  And I've definitely had my share of them.  I used to have one almost every other day at the peak of my anxiety.  

Let's break down these TIPS on how to handle a panic attack in yoga terms, shall we?

1- Practice TAPAS (self discipline). Panic attacks are mentally draining and physically stressful on our bodies, but they cannot hurt us.  When panic attacks happen, we often spend time trying to 'fight' against it or push it away.  Once an attack happens, the best thing to do is ride it out.  Just sit with it.  It's not easy, but there's no sense in fighting it.  Our bodies are already in 'fight' mode.  You know what anxiety is, you know it's causing this attack, so sit and move through it. Be present with what is happening.  Tapas teaches us that sometimes "burning" through something is the only way to get through it.

 2- ASANA. Do some yoga.  Move your body.  Stretch, vinyasa a bit or do some restorative yoga. Stay present with what you're doing and how you're moving your body.  Become aware in subtle shifts in energy and return your focus to your breath.  Legs Up the Wall and Forward Bend are great places to start!


3- Remember SATYA (truthfulness). You know what anxiety is.  You are, on some level, probably aware that what you are experiencing is indeed a panic attack and not an actual heart attack or stroke.  You know it will pass. You know what is happening to your body and you know you will live through it. So literally talk yourself through it.  Keep focusing on these TRUTHS.  If you can, let someone close to you know what is going on.  Shine light on what is happening to you.  The more light you cast on anxiety from speaking the truth about it, the less darkness it can bring to your life. You have the knowledge to talk yourself off the edge.  Or at the very least, talk yourself through the symptoms you experience from a panic attack. 

4- PRANAYAMA (breath work).  Breathe it out!  Deep belly breaths, alternate nostril breathing, equal breathing...  All of these are yogic breathing practices that help alleviate anxiety and either stop, or significantly shorten, a panic attack.  

5- Let go with ISHVARA PRANIDHANA (surrender).  Have trust that you can heal from this. Anxiety can make us feel helpless and unable to see a light at the end of the tunnel.  Stay dedicated to your journey and trust in the universe.  Have faith in your practice and strength.  Believe in yourself.  And lastly, surrender your struggles.  


xo b 

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Totally Tapas

4/30/2013

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My class theme this week has been Totally Tapas.  I created a flow that focused, quite literally, on heat.  The heat we create physically AND mentally. I felt it was appropriate after talking with someone about her journey with anxiety.  

I think the most important thing I've ever shared with my students and clients is that we don't lose our anxious tendencies overnight. We weren't born anxious.  We didn't come into this world with OCD and phobias.  It took time for us to create them through our perceptions and experiences.  The same is true for us to heal from anxiety.  It takes time.  There are so many times I see people have monumental breakthroughs, only to feel they are "cured" and then they slide right back into old patterns- which in turn cause the same anxieties to arise.  I know it gets frustrating when we find relief through yoga, breathing, EFT, etc. and it doesn't stick around that long.  Healing from anxiety is literally a practice, just like yoga.  There's no such thing as a "cure" because anxiety is an emotion. Just like happiness and anger.  We don't just eliminate it.  We learn how to work through it.  Similar to when we step on the mat in yoga.  Perhaps you're being challenged with a tough sequence full of poses that you struggle through.  You don't just step off your mat and leave, right?  At least I hope you don't!  You find a way to make the pose work for you!  Maybe you modify it or even just sit it out and take a child's pose.  Whatever it is, you figure it out.  And you go back again the next day, or the day after that. You keep working, practicing, and opening up new experiences.  I remember when I used to find headstand traumatizingly scary!  Now I love it!  It took patience, perserverence and commitment to get to that place.  Same with anxiety.  We will constantly be challenged along the way.  We just have to remember to stick through it and find a way to cope.  

So a tapas themed practice really called to my soul this week.  Tapas is the Sanskrit word for heat.  In yogic philosophy it is the fire that burns within us.  It is our self control, our focus, our drive, our discipline.  It is the discipline that we need to obtain a goal when we are faced with struggles along the way.  

So tap into your Tapas this week.  Identify your challenges and open up the space within you to have the discipline and mindfulness to keep pushing through.  Whether kicking into handstand or conquering a fear, you have the power within you to make it through! 

xo b


photo cred
https://www.google.com/search?q=handstand&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=uSqAUe-WHqaT0QGgnYDQDg&ved=0CAoQ_AUoAQ&biw=1366&bih=667#imgrc=BynKu219vE0doM%3A%3BGnUIE-hqXBinFM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.yogirose.com%252Fwp-content%252Fuploads%252F2010%252F07%252Fhandstand.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.yogirose.com%252F%253Fp%253D30%3B333%3B500

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    Author

    I'm a formerly anxious chick that found my zen on the mat. I used yoga, pranayama and yogic philosophies to alleviate my debilitating anxiety and get my life back on track. Now, I spend my time teaching yoga, coaching others and helping people find a more peaceful path in life. 

    * The opinions expressed on this blog are solely my own and what personally worked for me. Always consult a physician before starting any new yoga or workout routine. 

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